Stories of Love...
 My husband and I have one biological son. We had both always
wanted to have a large family but were unable to have any more
children naturally. When he was 12 we decided to take out a 2nd
mortgage on our home and either adopt or do invitro-fertilization.
After a lot of investigation we had almost made up our minds to
adopt two little girls from Russia for a fee of $25,000. But we
decided to go to an Adoption fair first. At the Adoption fair we
met the foster adopt worker from DCFS. She told us that there were
over 2000 children in the state of Washington waiting to be adopted,
and the adoption fee was either very low, or paid by the state.
Our first reaction was “Why would we adopt two children from
Russia when there are so many children right here waiting to be
adopted?” We must have talked her ear off for more than an
hour getting all kinds of information. My husband and I talked
about it all weekend, and then called the first thing on Monday
and signed up for the next foster care pre-service class.
About five months later we were licensed to be foster and/or adoptive
parents. At the same time we decided to do six months of invitro-fertilization.
In early August 1998 we received a call about a 13-month-old baby
boy who had gone off a second story balcony onto his head and his
27-month-old sister. After learning about them we were excited
to have them move in the following Monday when the baby got out
of the hospital. It was a very busy, very hard, yet incredibly
rewarding 1st year. Our little two-year-old girl (the Tasmanian
Devil as we secretly called her) had Reactive Attachment Disorder,
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and was extremely delayed in speech,
not to mention being quite a handful. Children’s Hospital
said our baby boy was the most depressed baby they had ever seen,
we spent the first few months driving him back and forth, he couldn’t
walk until 16 months and didn’t speak his first word until
18 months. Our Invitro-Fertilization adventure was not a success,
but to us it no longer mattered because we were on our way to having
the wonderful big family that we always wanted. By the end of the year they were completely changed! Our little
girl was a very sweet (almost well behaved) adorable 3-year-old.
And our baby boy was now a happy thriving 2 year old with only
a slight speech delay and minor motor delays. Things were going
so well we decided it was time for another child. Two weeks later
we received a 4-year-old girl who stayed with us for a year, (it
was very difficult to let her go, but we knew God had a plan for
us and unfortunately she wasn’t suppose to be a part of it).
A week later we also got a 6-day-old, 3lb 14oz Cocaine addicted
baby girl. Boy did we have a house full now! Our little boo (the
baby girl) was so small and so incredibly fragile. She had terrible
withdrawals, and had to stay in a quiet non-bright room swaddled
tightly and fed every 1½ hours. My husband was even afraid
to hold her for the first month. Today she is a beautiful, happy,
healthy, and incredibly intelligent 3-year-old. We adopted our
little boy and our little girl 2 years after having them come to
live with us, and our baby boo a year later. After baby boo we put our license on hold for a year, then we
opened up to short term receiving care and respite only. During
the next two years we had 19 kids come and stay anywhere from 1
to 10 days. It was a GREAT experience. Our kids loved having “new
friends” come over and spend the night. Not to mention the
impact you can make in a child’s life in just one day can
be incredibly rewarding.
Then in September 2001 we heard that a 14 year old boy who had
been doing volunteer work for me was going to be needing a new
foster home in the next couple months as his current placement
was taking a break from fostering. The private agency that he was
with mentioned that they were looking for an adoptive home like
ours for him. Well that got me thinking about him, and after two
weeks of keeping it to myself (getting a teen after only fostering
little ones seemed like a huge step) I told my family about his
story. Their first reaction was “When is he moving in”.
So the next day we called and told them we were interested in him
and would like more information. After finding out about his history
we decided it was time for him to meet our family. He started by
just coming over for dinner, then weekends, and then he moved in.
There was a big difference between little ones and teens, basically
more mental labor and less physical labor. He has been living with
us a year now, and it was a very difficult year with lots of stress,
lots of headaches, but also a lot of love, joy, tears, incredible
break-throughs and great accomplishments. He is now doing well
in school; he is the starting varsity center of his football team,
and is a varsity wrestler. He has great friends, is a wonderful
big brother (and most of the time…wink wink, he is a teen
after all) is a terrific kid. Then last June; we received a call that there were 20 kids needing
a foster home by that evening. We had been thinking of getting
another newborn baby girl sometime in the future, since our experience
with baby boo had turned out so great. But this was unexpected.
My husband and I discussed it and decided to ask about the youngest
girl they had. They told me about a very sweet chubby cheeked 22-month-old
with blond hair, green eyes and dimples, (how could anyone say
no?). Well we couldn’t, so that evening she came to live
with us. She, like many of the foster kids who come into care had
behavioral issues. She behaved much like our little Tasmanian devil
when we first got her. After 5 months she is now doing extraordinarily
better, where she used to bite and hit and scratch, and hated to
be touched. She now gives kisses and hugs and pets you and says
nice, and loves to sit on your lap and sing or read. But we still
have lots work to do, and lots more love to give. You never know
for sure until it happens, but it sounds like she might stay with
us a long time, or possibly even forever, her case worker said
it is heading for termination and that so far there are no relative
resources. I would like to say our family is now complete, but we are planning
on getting a bigger house next year, and well six is a terrific
number, seven sounds like it could be even better!
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